


The Ancient Curse

by imp_roper_keming



Series: Pint-sized Prompts [15]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Crack, Gen, Halloween, Rating for swearing and Janeway typical violence, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-15
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-22 13:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8287055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imp_roper_keming/pseuds/imp_roper_keming
Summary: It's just an average Halloween on Voyager.Really.Completely normal.





	

“Captain, I’m picking up a ship on sensors. It’s from Earth!” Ensign Kim shouts, interrupting his Captain’s 16th cup of coffee.

“Earth? Really? Again this season?”

“It’s an old sleeper ship. Like the one Kirk found Kahn on.”

“Mmm… supermen.” She wipes some drool off of her chin. “Hail them.”

“See if they have any radio, I wanna listen to old songs while I drive!” Tom squeals.

Suddenly, two puffs of smoke appear on the upper deck. Behind everyone. Because some people know how to use tactics. “Ahahahaha! We are freed from our eternal prison,” growls a werewolf.

Janeway jumps up. “Silverpaw, my ancient enemy! And Moon Moon! I, Ekatarina Lightbringer, shall vanquish you forever once the lighting gets dark and the fog machine starts!”

“Captain, that’s not your name,” comments Tuvok.

She hushes him. “Quiet! There’s an ancient curse on my family that makes no sense in cannon, alright?!”

She pulls a crossbow from the giant bun on her head. “Shit! That’s vampires, hang on.” A katana, four vials of holy water, and a bunch of garlic cloves are pulled from her hair before she finds an AK-47 loaded with silver bullets.

The werewolves leap into action. Moon Moon stumbles comically. Silverpaw’s claws flash through the air, glinting in the now dramatically dim lighting.

Chakotay yells, “My Spirits, you killed Harry!”

“You bastards!” Tom adds.

“Hasta la vista, baby!” shrieks Janeway as she shoots wildly at the intruders. They ded.

“Captain, we could have made peace! I had an ancient tale ready and everything.”

“Oh, no, they’re controlling you from the other ship!”

“What? No! I always say shit like tha-”

She shoots him. He ded too.

“Chakotay does usually say that, Captain.” comments Tom.

She glares. “Mind. Control.”

“Uh, yeah! I’ll just-” he chucks a thumb at the pilot’s station.

“Tuvok! Destroy that ship with our most powerful weapon!”

He sighs and beams some leola root meatloaf into space, igniting it with the ship’s phasers. A dramatic explosion happens. The lighting returns to normal.

“Now that’s taken care of, I need a new First Officer and love interest. Any takers?”

A dread howl fills the Bridge.

Janeway swings up her gun dramatically.

A tiny wolf pup trots out from Ops, hopping into Chakotay’s old chair. “Awoooo?”

“Well, I guess.”

“Isn’t Harry cursed, Captain?”

“Only a little, we’ll avoid full moons on the way home, just to be safe.”


End file.
